I've Never Heard THAT Song.

A couple of my 4th graders wanted to sing a song for me today.  It went like this:

O give me a home where the buffalo roam

And the deer and the antelope play

Where solemn is heard and the birds need the Word

And the clouds are just cloudy all day.

O, home on the range

Where the deer and the antelope play

Where solemn is heard and the birds need the Word

And the clouds are just cloudy all day.

Severe Weather?...Or Not.

Today in my 5th grade Science class, the following exchange happened:

Me:  "Each student will choose a type of severe weather..."
T: "I get 'volcano!'"
Me:  "Um.  A volcano is not weather."
Class: *blank stares*
Me:  "When was the last time you looked outside and said, 'hmm....looks like volcanic eruptions today.'?"
N:  "Ms. Roach!  You tell the funniest jokes!"

Seriously??

Um...EEEWWW!

My fourth and fifth graders are unusually interested in what I eat for lunch.  They are often alarmed that I eat characters from Veggie Tales and always concerned that I don't have any ranch dip.  (They just don't understand how anyone could like "naked" vegetables.)  They are sometimes fascinated, like when I bring a whole green pepper and bite into it just like an apple, and sometimes grossed-out...like today.

There I am, minding my own, enjoying my lunch when I hear, "Ms. Roach! WHAT are you eating?"

Me: "Green beans."
A: "Why are you eating them with your fingers?"
Me: "Because they are raw."
L: "EEEEEEEWWWWW!"
Me: "What do you mean 'ew'? You don't like green beans?"
L: "Not raw! I only like them cooked with mayonnaise on them."
Me: "um.....eeewww!"


Seriously...that can't be normal.

How God Answers Prayer...According to 9 Year Olds

The other day we had a lesson on prayer that included what prayer is, who can pray, how to pray and how God answers our prayers.  This lesson was followed up by a worksheet for homework.  The last question on said worksheet was:

What answers might God give  to your prayers?

Here is how my fourth grade students answered that question:

"Yes."       "No."      "Wait."     "Maybe."      "You are a very lucky little girl."      "OK."      "I will think about it."        "Give Me some time."       "Wait and see."         "It's good to be thankful."


Sometimes...they crack me up.

Here Comes the Bride...

OK.  Everyone just CALM DOWN...  I am not getting married.


But now that I have your attention, let me tell you what I learned from a fifth grader today.






Science Question:  What is an example of how thermal expansion affects our everyday life?


Student Answer:  A bride. It has joints and when it is hot, they can swell, but when it is cold they come back together and it doesn't come apart.




Um....OK.....

While that IS true, I think she meant to say "bridge".